Some days, like today, I miss my old career self. I miss my fast-talking, PR slinging self, calling reporters, doing TV interviews and holding valuable information from the C-suite.
These days, I’m the CEO. My job includes playing at the park, making home cooked meals, cleaning, paying bills, running errands. It sounds boring, but most days, I do feel accomplished, at least in my own little world. I’m reading a good book and get in some bad reality TV while surfing the web (do people still use that phrase?). I’m constantly trying to order pictures that I never seem to do, get easily sidetracked by text messages and Facebook, and seem to do endless amounts of laundry. I talk daily (in my head) about doing something with my “book” but it just sits on my computer. Somehow it’s easier that way.
I have a good life. One that is probably better than most. I get to stay home with my daughter and watch her grow and learn. I’m not saying that in a cliché way or to make myself feel better, I truly feel I am fortunate. I live in a nice house and have great family and friends that I get to see often because I am home. But some days, I miss the executive the world. The same world that I would bitch and moan about while I was in it (i.e. underpaid, shitty bosses, the commute).
I used to do some pretty cool things while I worked in public relations. I handled communications for the Red Cross during Sully’s epic landing of Miracle on the Hudson; I launched HD Radio (when it was supposed to be a big thing back in 2006); I worked with high ranking CEOs; managed crises; traveled. I used my mind in completely different ways. I knew what was trending, wore more than yoga pants and tank tops, and sported pretty fabulous shoes.
Sadly, I was at a dead end job during my last phase of employment. There was no advancing, no one really knew what I did or the importance of having a PR representative despite my best efforts, and it was really lonely. So transitioning from that world to my current one wasn’t too tough because my world now is much fuller, even if the demands are different.
But there are some days, days like today, when I miss being “important;” where people, and the public, depended on me, little ‘ol me to relay and disseminate crucial and critical information. Information beyond what we’re having for dinner or if I called the repairman. Yet, I wouldn’t change my situation or give up this gig to have it all back. It’s just nice to remember my old “career self” every now and then for a feel good, ego boost moment. I’ll be back someday though. Don’t you worry.